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I have a right to be left in peace


Photo by G. Bielz



Hands off my private life! This is addressed to a certain person who knows that I refer to her! Is this clear enough! I hope so!




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Autumn Thoughts III



The world hasn’t changed that much. Apparently we have become more selfish and more utilitarian. I remember the disgust in my mother’s eyes, when she told me that in the 1950s and 60s farmers in the rich parts of Upper Austria brought their ailing wives to hospital shortly before they were dying. When asked why they had not come earlier, they said, “I call the vet for my cows, because they are a valuable asset, but I can find a new wife and possibly gain some more land by marrying a rich one”.


I have heard of older men who don’t allow their wives to switch the light on when it is dark or use a fan when it is so hot that they might succumb to a heat stroke. For these people saving money, and believe me, they are well off, is more important than the wellbeing of their loved or shall I say hated ones. Yes, and there are mean and greedy women, too.


There is something that is called “Altersgeiz” in German; perhaps one could call it penny pinching in old age.


It could be one of the expressions of dementia. It could be plain nastiness or that these people had been mean well before they aged. It could be that fear of dying manifests itself in not letting go of valuables and money by hoarding them and not sharing them.


Having too many assets is valued in this society. Look at Rupert Murdoch, the octogenarian, who wants to swallow up Warner Brothers to become even richer and more powerful! So sycophants can become even more sycophantic. It is control and not being able of letting go, in Freudian terms an expression of being anally retentive, that is valued and celebrated. If people like Murdoch would eat too much, they would become immensely obese. They would be judged as unhealthy and anti-social in today’s society. But people who amass more and more assets, often by exploiting cheap labour or weak laws, or even by cheating, are seen as role models in a sick society. Though, society has been ill and money has been the main value for quite a while.


Austerity does idolise money. It has become a form of life itself. It has become so important that one sacrifices people, citizens and children under the pretence of having to reduce debt and refilling the treasure chest. Money is more important than people. The term “human capital” is telling. Everything is capital in a neoliberal society. All is material and all can be capitalised. Human capital is here in abundance, while oil and diamonds are rather rare. I’d like to refer to the dire working conditions on some oil rigs and in most diamond mines. In a neoliberal society human capital is not worth a lot with the exception of the crème de la crème, the self-nominated leaders, gang masters and masters of exploitation. They know how to run the show and keep the masses in the circuit of self-exploitation.


So many people are lonely when they age; and so many ageing people, who are lonely, have been so before and don’t share and don’t let go. Too many people value materialistic stuff, their houses, their cars, and their status symbols. They moan and groan about being lonely, but are still not willing to share, even if it is only a cup of tea or a smile.


I am not ageist. I am ageing myself and observing the world around me. I am not lonely, but alone sometimes. And I do not mind being alone. I still love life and people, not always, but most of the time. I still have a mission, and I have desires and targets. I am an artist. I have a life. Getting older does not mean that one has to succumb to loneliness; and it also doesn’t mean that one has the right to be nasty and bitter and angry (especially towards others), just because one has lived for quite a while.


Music: Money by Pink Floyd,

Photo source: Central Park from the Mayflower on the Park Hotel, N.Y.C., © 2004 by Gudrun Bielz

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Why did it take me so many years to find out that I am fine? I am an artist, not a kindergarten teacher. I am not here to bolster some insecure guy’s weak ego, only to be diminished and attacked for what I am and what I am not.


Music: Eminem, “The Way I am”.

Photo source: copyright Gudrun Bielz, 2014

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Crazy normality – normal craziness


We live in strange times. Today Osborne (let’s call him Georgie) announced the UK budget (mainly cuts). This enforces possible and already existing horrors like the need for more food banks and unemployed people being made responsible for unemployment (and punished) hence distracting from the dire economic state caused by the banks. This will lead to people needing to lend money from rogue lenders, creating more poverty (there is some envy and anger here in the UK, mainly by people who need to blame somebody, to find scapegoats. This is a rather common though nasty habit not only in the UK). The Tories  are playing political games with people (people are like chess figures for them perhaps). More importantly, there is an article in the Guardian that 139 people complained about the low cut dress the VOICE (BBC1) presenter had worn on Saturday — Gosh, I would like to have this problem, being more concerned with a low cut dress than with a country ruled by politicians, who think that budget cuts will show the ‘plebs’ that one has to be born into money and keep it offshore (despite some noises indicating that offshore companies will be taxed). Lots of austerity, lots of hypocrisy, perhaps no growth in economy, Little England trying to blame Europe, the big spying scandal – commercial espionage — etc. etc. And on top of it, oh Guardian, you get it sometimes wrong. ‘How to wear a leather jacket’ with really expensive jackets and dresses, perhaps to let us forget austerity times, or as a goodwill gesture for the new class of middle-aged Tory voters, who are not really concerned by the cuts. Not at all.

Picture 1

Photo sources:, The Guardian

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Another narrative about the London riots

I have listened to another narrative that these youths are just looting for the sake of looting, that their parents should contain them. They are THE  NO FUTURE generation, no social cohesion, the narrative of a community that only exists on paper or in tribes – gang land – no proper education, as state education has become quite appalling. (Most middle class people put their kids into private education or move houses, so they can live in a catchment area for the better state schools). I know of teachers, who have told me that they do mainly lion taming and not any teaching. AND DON’T FORGET THAT THERE ARE NO JOBS FOR THEM. THEY HAVE NOTHING TO LOOK FORWARD TO,  except the mantra of SAVING SAVING SAVING, and actually it was the CRIMINAL BEHAVIOUR of big banks that caused this recession.

I do not condone of THE LOOTING. I think it is pretty bad, as it scares the people living in the areas, but not the government so much. It is interesting that the rioters tackle goods, the sacred cow of this extreme capitalist society. There are people talking about fearing for their lives. So far, nobody other than police have been harmed, as I understand. This is bad enough. I am against violence. But it seems to me that these guys are not out to kill people, but to get access to what is so holy in this country: OBJECTS OF DESIRE, GOODS. It is an attack on the goods. It is an attack on the extended identity of the ones, who are better off. This is defined by bigger houses, bigger cars, better schools, only for their own children, not for the greater good of the society: GOODS, GOODS, GOODS. It is also wanting from the surplus of these SEDUCTIVE objects that is the gluttony of others. They do not have the financial power yet.  They have been taught this narrative, it is a language they understand.

Of course, the riots cause fear, and certainly, they are not good, not nice, not civilised; and protest should happen in another way. REALITY IS, IT DOES HAPPEN THIS WAY. THINK ABOUT THE RIOTS IN PARIS AND OTHER CITIES WELL BEFORE THE LONDON RIOTS. IT IS ALWAYS ABOUT LACK, LACK OF RESPECT, LACK OF SOCIAL BELONGING, LACK OF ASSETS, LACK OF LOVE; AND THIS IS THE LANGUAGE THE RIOTERS HAVE LEARNED FROM THIS SOCIETY, TOO. THEY ARE JUST EXECUTING, WHAT THEY HAVE LEARNED WITH A FAR STRONGER NARRATIVE: DESTRUCTION, ANGER, VIOLENCE, ENVY, HATRED, RESIGNATION, NO HOPE FOR A BETTER FUTURE.  Let’s not forget that the Paris riots in 2005 were driven by hopeless, undervalued and badly treated Algerian youths, who were never seen as part of the fabric of the French society, though all the official songs had sung a different tune.

These riots are only an itch for the government and food for the media that is always hungry for new stories.

It is a sad fact that Thatcher’s idea of Britain has become reality. WE LIVE IN A BROKEN SOCIETY.

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